On Sunday at work, a customer called me 'hot'. It sort of got me thinking - does being told I'm hot make me feel good? When writing this blog, I found a post on Fetlife along a similar vein - basically asking if being called hot was something that you found flattering.
I think that being called 'hot' or 'sexy' refers only to physical characteristics, not to a person's personality, or 'insides'. It's not something that offends me if I'm called it, but if someone is always calling me hot and nothing else, then I know they're not legitimately interested in getting to know me.
Is it a word men use because they don't know what else to sad and it's just become a space filler, or do they really mean it? It there an equilvent that girls use when referring to boys? Did I always not like it, or is it just because I'm getting older and possibly even more mature, and want someone to like me for me, rather than shallow reason?
Maybe I'm the only one that finds it condescending. Sure, in the right context, it's fine. Good, even. Of course I like to be told I'm attractive, who doesn't? I do feel like it's forcing me to conform to societal norms - you know, 'girls should be pretty and quiet and well-mannered, and make food for the men-folk'. I'm not even really against objectification - that's fine, if that's what you want to do and you're not hurting anyone, go for it.
I think the real reason I don't like it is because it's so unoriginal. It takes no thought to tell someone they're hot or sexy. You don't have to actually look at me and comment on my eyes or my hair or whatever; it's a generic comment, much like sending a standard reply on a dating website. It's cheap. And it reeks of cheap.
Does this bother anyone else? What would you rather be called? Do you like being called 'hot'? What's the male equilivent?
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