I am married to my sub/slave bev. I enjoy humiliating her to the point of tears.
I have written on her, spit and pissed on her but I am looking for something a little more extreme.
I was thinking about taking her out in public, in the middle of winter wearing only post-it notes. Force her to walk a crowded city block and I will pick her up when she is done.
The post-it notes would cover her privates and nipples and be attached to other parts of her body. Saying that she is a fat ass. That she is a dumb fucking whore. That she has rolls and cellulite. One by her mouth saying to piss in it.
Maybe have a "tailed" butt plug shoved into deep into her ass for her walk.
As long as her privates are covered I don't believe we are in violation of any laws.
I think this sounds hot and I would love to watch her reaction before, during and after.Any suggestions to make this better? If this is not your thing please don't criticize.
Sunday, January 16, 2011
How far does consent go?
I know we've covered safe, sane and consensual, but I saw this today on fetlife and had to say something.
Okay class, hands up who can tell me what's wrong with this picture?
Let's ignore the fact that this guy obviously wants to humiliate his sub - there's nothing wrong with that as long as she consents, even if it's not something you're into. Let's ignore the name calling - it might be unpalatable to you (and me, if I'm going honest - seriously, take note - calling me dumb and fat will not get you anywhere with me!), but it is obviously something that they like, and that's okay.
SSC stands for 'safe, sane and consensual'. The scenario above probably isn't going to be unsafe, especially as this person is pretty sure they aren't breaking any laws. I'd beg to differ, but if he believes they're not, that's on him. Sane - without putting our own views in there, I'm sure that he can argue that it's sane. He likes it, we can assume she likes it, or at least has consented to it by being his slave.
The issue here lies with the consensual part. He's clearly consenting, and we assume her consent through her slave status. But what about all of the people in public, who will see this near naked woman covered in insults walking down the street? Unless everyone was 100% aware that this was going to happen and had the choice to go somewhere else or avoid it, they're not consenting. In a public street, there are likely to be children who are underagedand therefore unable to consent.
The other thing is there is a general rule that you won't impose your kink onto any people who have not consented. This is, I think, especially important with 'vanilla' people - like the un-expecting people doing their shopping at lunch time. Most of us probably wouldn't want to see two people having sex in public, or a husband hitting a wife, or someone defecating in public, so why would it be okay to assume that other people want to witness something that usually happens 'behind closed doors'? And before I get jumped on for the domestic abuse thing; I'm not for a second implying that it's okay if it happens in private, that's ridiculous.
The only caveat I have to this rule about not imposing kink on others is the fact that I don't think sex should be some secret, private thing that we should feel ashamed about. If we keep sex, kinky or otherwise, a secret, then we are perpetuating this shame. That's an issue for me, because sex really shouldn't be so scary and embarrassing. In saying that, I still don't think sex should be imposed on unwilling participants; at the end of the day, consent is the trump card.
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I completely agree with this. The writer seems to be completely unaware that other people may find the sight of his partner distressing. THEY HAVE NOT CONSENTED.
ReplyDeleteIt also speaks to an attitude among kinky people that I find slightly distressing: call it "freaking out the vanillas" for lack of a better term. I don't think kink should be shoved in possibly unwilling people's faces just so the kinkster can feel proud about how open minded they are compared to other people.
It's different in a context like the Folsom Street fair of course, where anyone coming in should know what to expect. But in everyday life? Ugh.
Exactly. It's not okay that vanilla people put their sex life out in public, so why for a second would it be okay for kinky people? And that's not about being open minded, that's about being respectful of other people.
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