Are you gender appropriate?

Yesterday, I went on a fun shopping excursion to Lower Hutt. Well, actually, it's 2 weeks before Christmas, so it was a godawful shopping trip that ended in tears. Yes, I know I'm an adult, but apparently, that doesn't mean I'm above losing my shit in the middle of a mall, it just means that I get embarrassed by it.

Before I tell you what my meltdown was about, let me express my disgust at this.


Yes, these two toys are exactly the same, in different boxes with slightly different coloured fur. Take a guess at which one is aimed at boys and which is aimed at girls.

When I was growing up, my dad bought me trains and lego and frisbees. Sure, I also had dolls and Barbies, but not all of my toys were gender specific. The more I look at kids toys, the more I feel sad for kids these days. There are probably 10 year old boys out there now who have never played with dolls, and 10 year old girls who have never played with trains.

Can you tell which aisle is for girls and which is for boys?





Anyway, aside from that, it was the usual Christmas shopping; way way way too many people, everyone stopping in the middle of walkways, screaming children and no parks. Pretty much sounds like your ideal Sunday, right?

Anyway, on to my meltdown. So, my shoulder was sore and I was pissed off at everyone walking around like clowns and it was noisy and hot and horrible. Then I saw this.



Yes, that is what you think. BYS "Down the Rabbit Hole" from the Alice and Wonderland collection. And I HAD to have it. I didn't have an eftpos card with me, and no one else stepped forward to purchase it, so in came my tanty. I know, it's childish and pathetic. And embarrassing. But you can't argue with the result!

(Yes, the pictures are blurry, but that's just to show the holo goodness)

Wear red in support of Sexual Abuse Victims

I hate red nail polish. I don't know why, but I really do. I don't think it looks good on me, and it looks very conformist, which I don't like. I'm much more into more 'out there' colours, like blue and green and purple and black, even.

But today is a special day, it's a day where people all round the world, especially some of my friends in the US, are wearing red in support of sexual abuse victims.

Today, I'm wearing red nail polish. I had to buy 4 different reds to find one that suited me best, and, because the world is a little bit of a stroppy bitch, the first one I bought that cost $2 looks the best on me. It's a Miki Mini in red, a beautiful jelly/creme that would look fab on anyone else but me.



I don't know why this day resonates so strongly with me, usually days where you have to buy a ribbon or donate some coins to get a sticker don't really bother me. I guess sexual abuse is something that's pretty close to my heart (well, not literally, but there's not really a better way of putting that!), so it's something I'll get behind and support. I know that no amount of money or apologies will ever take back the horror that people who have been sexually abused have experienced, but maybe knowing that someone cares about what they've been through will give them a light at the end of the tunnel.

Just a side note though, why do we have to call people who have been sexually abused 'victims'? It's such a dirty word, and I don't think it accurately describes people who have been sexually abused. Not all of them, anyway. I also hate the word 'survivor'. Maybe I just hate all the labels. People who have been sexually abused are people before they are 'victims' or 'survivors' or whatever other box you want to put them in. I don't know what you should call them, but maybe just give people the dignity to not be stereotyped.

FFS, sickness

So anyone who follows me on Twitter will know that I've been sick for the last week. I swear I'm getting sicker every day, and it really sucks. All I want to do is stay home in bed, but I don't think that's going to happen.

I've been using Revitanail on my newly naked nails - I took my acrylics off 2 weeks ago today and have been waiting, not so patiently, for my 3 weeks after which they will be strong and lovely. So far, they've grown heaps and are looking great. I've cheated a few times and worn colour, but only because I can't stand to have boring natural looking nails when I've got all that polish there staring at me!!!

Here they are the day I removed the acrylics:

Here they are after 1 week:

I've filed them down lots since then, so they're a nicer shape. Unfortunately, I aslo managed to chip a huge chunk off my left middle finger. It's pretty ugly, but is growing back remarkably quickly. Hopefully it will be nice and long by next week!

You know, I really think drinking water is doing great for my nails. They seem to be growing much much faster than they ever did before I drank this much!

Green with envy

I don’t think I’ve ever admitted this before, but sometimes, I see a thin woman and I am jealous. I look at her and think ‘wow, you must have your life together, you must make good choices, and have nice clothes, and be smart with a great family and awesome, happy friends.’ Now, I know this is ridiculous. Thin people have problems too. And thin does not equal healthy. Thin doesn’t equal happy.

I’ve spent a lot of time trying to recognise where my jealousy comes from. I’m not inherently a jealous person. I think what it is, is that I know that one day, I’m going to look just like them. The jealousy is that I HATE to wait. I’m impatient, and I want to be like them NOW, not in 18 months.

I really don’t think that my life will be perfect when I reach my goal weight. I think this is a trap that a lot of people fall into; they idolise who they will be when they’ve lost the weight and forget that happiness is the sum of many parts. They get there, and don’t feel the perfection they thought they would. This leads to depression, resentment, and they follow the same cycle to gain all that weight right back.

I know that perfection isn’t even worth aiming for. I do think that I will be happier when I’ve lost the weight because I will be able to look back on where I’ve come from, and see that making small changes over a long time does make a difference. But I will strive not to let this define me, especially while I’m taking this journey. It’s really easy to get caught up and obsessed with one thing, and it’s not healthy. People need balance.

With that in mind, let me show you my super-cute nails from the other day. This is 1 coat of black polish, 2 coats of OPI DS Coronation and black Konad stamps from plate m45. I had these on for 3 or 4 days, and they looked awesome, right to the very end.